Tuesday, May 27, 2008

Slow and Steady

My cup cabinet kills me. I've been hanging on to some straw cups because they're very useful at times. But usually they're just a pain in the ass to clean. And I have a friend that needed to strip them for parts, so they were sort of useful to someone.

And also I have two beer mugs that I continue to keep because they're nice. But I never use them. Never. (We're straight from the bottle sort of folks.)


So, six more items gone.

*****

I love the W.W.S.D.* Theory of Decluttering some of you have been putting forth. Does that mean I'm some sort of guru? I wanna be a guru.

* What Would Stimey Do

Monday, May 26, 2008

Total Items Thus Far: 1000

WhyMommy asked me: "Hey, Stimey, you're getting awfully close to 1000 donated items! What will you do to celebrate?" I joked that I was going to go shopping, but I thought instead I would talk a little about why I categorize my posts as I do.

You'll notice that I categorize my posts by how I disposed of the items described within. I thought a lot about what to use for categories: types of clutter, room in which clutter came from, a mix of the above. I settled on the way I got rid of things because it's important to me that I'm not just moving my stuff from the landfill of my house to the landfill of Maryland.

I'm pleased to see that donations are ahead of trash, but just barely. I guess that's the nature of junk—much of it is just not good enough to pass on. Although if you add the donations category to the force on give to friend category, my donations are waaaay ahead.

I've mailed things away, driven things away, and had people come pick things up. I even mailed some CDs and hand towels to readers. Thus far, I haven't sold anything, but eventually I might.

I'm always interested in creative ways to get rid of my stuff and great places that can use donations. Always let me know if you hear of a place.

And even though I started this blog as a motivational tool to keep me on task with uncluttering, it's been wonderful to find all of you who are actually interested in what I'm doing. My own husband only skims this blog, and it's his stuff I'm getting rid of.

I've loved hearing your own stories and reading your blog posts about your own decluttering efforts. I am amazed every time I get a comment and learn that I've inspired someone to get rid of something or to donate their wedding dress. You all rock. I can't believe you read here.

My life is getting incrementally better every day with the removal of all these things. Thank you for your moral support! And here's to the next 1000!

Sunday, May 25, 2008

Teak Schmeak

You know how when you're trying to shave your legs in the shower, but there's nothing to put your foot on, you end up slicing your shins and ankles open and then bleeding all over your bath mat?

You know how you shell out a gazillion dollars to buy a teak stool to put in your shower to prevent such an instance, because teak is supposed to last forever?

Exhibit A:


Apparently the lesson here is that you shouldn't buy the cheapest teak you can find at Bed, Bath & Beyond. Stupid rotted teak.

Also in that photo are several full bottles of tar shampoo. Yes, my psoriasis would be better if I used it. No, I can't bring myself to.

Oh, and also one of those things that you use to grate your feet.

It's amazing how much clutter can be in one small space. (7)

*****

Stay tuned for an upcoming post celebrating my crossing the 1000 item mark!

Friday, May 23, 2008

Peer Pressure, Anyone?

Today at Quinn's 3-year-old well child visit, the doctor asked how he was doing with potty training.

"We're working on it," I said. "It's mostly just a matter of us taking a few days and really going at it."

"I'll talk to him about it," the doctor said.

The appointment continued and when the doctor had Quinn take off his pants, he said, "Oh, Quinn, I see you're wearing diapers. All the three-year-olds I know wear underpants and go pee and poop in the potty." Then he went on to tell Quinn how he had to send the doctor all of his diapers so the doctor could give them to the babies because Quinn didn't need them anymore because Quinn isn't a baby.

Oh.

Shit.

So my hand has been forced. My laziness has been upset. My half-assed/drawn-out potty training days are over.


Total items for today: 12 diapers

I told Quinn that Dr. Datch would be coming by to pick them up off the porch. When did all the rampant lying begin?

Also, while the doctor was examining Jack, Quinn pooped the biggest, smelliest poop possible. (In his diaper, of course.) This may not go well.

Anyone use size 6 Huggies?

Wednesday, May 21, 2008

Slacker Stimey No More

I don't know if you get periodic phone calls from different organizations saying, "We're going to have a truck in your neighborhood on May 22, do you have any stuff you can donate?"

[Note: The date is not always May 22. Although sometimes it is.]

Ever since I started The Junk Pyramid I've made an effort to say yes whenever one of these organizations calls. Thus far, I've gotten four calls. I've said yes to three of them. I had to turn one down because it was for the day before someone else was coming.

When the National Children's Center called a couple weeks ago and asked if they could take some stuff on May 22, I agreed. I assumed I would have accumulated a lot of stuff by then.

Unfortunately, the two weeks between then and now coincided with a heretofore unheard of era of slackerdom here at The Pyramid. This afternoon when I was putting my measly little bag of items together, I decided to do a little digging to flesh out my donation. So I visited my garage.

And hoo boy, did I flesh it out:


A few of those things I have to throw away. I don't think anyone wants a slightly dirty duvet or dog bed. Or a used litter box. But the baby gates and the toys? Score.

See Sam standing inside the house wistfully looking at me as I got rid of his toys?

I'm pretty sure my neighbors were wondering what exactly the hell I was doing too.

Also in my garage I found a garbage bag full of outgrown clothes that I had separated out at some point in the past and then forgotten about.

Lots of outgrown clothes. These clothes:


My sad little donation looks a lot more awesome now.

Total items for today...(wait for it)...: 115

Sunday, May 18, 2008

Five Easy Pieces

I forgot to put this up yesterday so decided to post it today with the list of the many things I was going to declutter today.

But I took a nap instead.

So here are the five things I gave to my friend yesterday. She is taking over my board position in my moms' club, so she gets to find a place for these for the next year.

I wasn't sure they counted for The Junk Pyramid, but she assured me they did.

So I present, in all its glory, the paraphernalia of the babysitting co-op coordinator position in my moms club. Gone.

Friday, May 16, 2008

Life in a Boy House

I got rid of a few toy cars today.


There were more, but Quinn reclaimed some of them. We still have a bunch because we loves us some fun little cars. But I thought we might play with them more if there were fewer of them.

Ironically, I'm a little sad to be getting rid of them now that I figured out how much fun it is to park them and tow them and stuff. (See photo.)

Total items for today: 52 cars and 1 pajama top that was hiding under Quinn's bed.

Tuesday, May 13, 2008

My Junk Pyramid Barometer

I was able to get rid of seven articles of pajama clothing in about three minutes at bedtime tonight. You wanna know how I did it? I showed each item of clothing to Quinn. If it made him do this:


I got rid of it.

See?

Thursday, May 8, 2008

Brief Hiatus

The Junk Pyramid is going on hiatus until at least Wednesday. And because I won't be near my stuff, I'm not going to increase any of the numbers in "The Count" over there to the right.

I guess 1000 items will have to wait even longer. Because, for some reason, I don't think my house-sitters will be decluttering for me. Unless they steal my TV.

If I'm lucky, they won't bring more stuff into my house. Which I would totally do if it was me doing the house-sitting. They'd come back from vacation, and I'd be all, "I don't have any idea how that box of clothes and old toys got here. Weird."

*****

But I did do a teensy bit of decluttering I haven't given myself full blogging credit for.

I babysat two brothers for a few hours on Thursday, which gave me the perfect opportunity to give my crap directly to a child without having to ask the parent for permission first. I gave them each a ball, one featuring Scooby Doo's likeness, and one with Clifford.

I didn't post about this then because it seemed ridiculous to publish only that paragraph you just read. But I did add those balls to the count. You're just lucky I didn't count the Backyardigans tattoo I put on one of the kids too.

Tuesday, May 6, 2008

Are You on the Edge of Your Chair?

Are you dying to know the fate of the wedding dress?

Well the poll results were pretty decisive:

* Thirteen percent said to keep it. (That sounds more impressive than "Five people said to keep it.")
* Thirteen percent said they are just as wishy washy as me.
* A whopping 73 percent said I should donate the hell out of it.

Thank you to all who voted and commented. I had fun with the poll. I think we may see more of them here soon. I have this analog camcorder I can't decide if I should hang onto or trash...

Head over to DC Metro Moms to see what's going to happen to the dress.

Monday, May 5, 2008

An Ecclectic Group of Six

I'm back! Didya miss me? And my junk? Here are 5 of today's 6 items (And Sam. I'm keeping him.):


1. Sam wanted to be in this photo because one of the items is his. My mother's helper came over today and just before she got here, Sam brought out this little photo album and said he wanted to give it to her. We used to keep photos of all his friends in this book (his "friendship book"), but he's outgrown it and has a new album/friendship book.

By the way, I love that Sam didn't question my reasoning for taking a photo of a bunch of junk. He just requested a copy.

2. I have a pair of pants that I love. My dog used to be attached to a zip line in my backyard because she could jump fences. (Don't worry, I'm going somewhere.) One day a couple summers ago, she somehow made it over the four-foot or so back fence, while attached to her tether, so I had to climb over the fence and heave her back over. (She's a 50-something pound shepherd mix, by the way.) I don't remember if I ripped my pants going over or coming back, but I did. The rip was small enough and on the side, so that I was still able to wear the pants if I wasn't going to visit the president or anything. Today while putting on Quinn's shoes, I heard something rip and felt a breeze on my thigh.

Goodbye, pants. You've served me well.

3-5. Three shirts. Quinn's not going to wear them. And I needed three more items.

6. If I don't really cook from cookbooks, then I don't need this cookbook holder. It's like today, when I was talking about my cookbook cabinet to a friend and how I really need to clean it out. This project has been weighing on my mind for a while now so I said, "My cookbooks are making me sad." But she heard me say, "My cookbooks are making me fat." Which is funny, because in order for my cookbooks to make me fat, I would have to prepare food out of them.

All of which is to say, if I need to get rid of 80% of my cookbooks because I don't use them, this cookbook holder is really just going to waste. It's kind of gross too. I obviously used it at some point because the sides are singed and it's kind of greasy.

Another funny thing about this cookbook stand: I used it for months before I realized that it was so hard to see through because it had a clear, protective, REMOVABLE film on the front of it. (Honestly though, this was to be expected. We had a microwave for years before we realized that the keypad had that kind of film over it. We were really mad that the numbers were wearing off. But in fact, it was just the disposable film.)

And that's further proof that I can write a long, rambling post about six of anything.

Thursday, May 1, 2008

Decluttering is Becoming the Norm

My decluttering was such a non-event today that I almost forgot to blog it.

Basically I just found a lot of random crap to throw away while doing my everyday cleaning. See?


Is it just me, or does it look like Captain Feathersword is wearing braces?

I count this batch as 12 items.

Unfortunately I can only add 11 items to my count because De in D.C. convinced me to take back the cone. Her suggestion: a goal for backyard soccer. Of course!

So I threw it back in the garage and will bring it back out when I try to tire my kids out by running drills in the backyard.